I was on Twitter when I read someone wrote,

Some people come to our lives and leaves. And our life is never the same.

I could not help agree with that. In recent days, I have this ‘tragic’ realisation as to how true that really is. The realisation is made greater by the absence of someone whom I can talk to. The situation has worsened manifold by the fact that there in fact are some people who have already lent their helping hands. It’s just that I am not in a position to share.

It has been my lifelong observation that I follow curves of mood-swing all the time. That’s just a less rude way to say that I am moody. Well, call me so, and I won’t complain. But for the last one week or so, the only mood has been gloom and despair. Music has always been my best friend. But it seems like even music refuses to stand by. This is probably the worst thing about the situation.

Some major changes in thought process has also taken place on a certain level. I am starting to lose faith in every relationship. Looking back, such thoughts once crossed my mind. That was teenage. I am more complex and, to a certain extent, more mature. I am almost certain this change is going to stay for long, if not for a lifetime or longer.

Keeping myself busy with things that matter, might be the answer. But that is not working either. Finding solace in reading or learning, gives almost no reason to smile. Distraction is eluding me when I need it the most.

The last few days made me grow older. Much older than I biologically am. But life goes on.